How Can I Learn To Control My Anger?? Its Really Bad. And Dont Say Anger Management.?

You take things personally and then let it drive your emotions. Try laughing at a situation before you throw some anger about. Maybe even just tell yourself that’s life before you feel the urge to control with distruction. Allow yourself to not be GOD all the time, sometimes just witnessing something is enough. Sometimes things have to go wrong for you to see that you don’t need to be the authority. Try and look at the funny side, or storybook side where you are the third person.

Anger is the result of unmet needs or being thwarted from getting something you want. First you have to figure out what these things are. What is causing you such great frustration? To have adult temper tantrums is very childish. You have to learn to verbalize in a calm and rational manner what it is you want. Maybe you need some assertiveness training so you can put your needs into words. Also, you’ll have to learn to nip you anger in the bud long before it builds to the stage you describe or in the meantime while you’re learning some other techniques, buy a punching bag. They now have apartment types that have a base you fill with sand. Better than the added expense of having to replace your furniture.

real talk !!!! call the police, with that attitude you will be going to jail real soon, what ever your angry about or hating the world you wont be to happy sitting in a jail cell. all your going to keep doing is pay for the items that you broke your not to smart you dont break your own things , along with bailing your self out jail. i will never tell you to count to ten, just look over your shoulder cus there will be that someone that is going to have a worst attitude than yours, so if you don’t check it quick, you can believe some one else will check it for you, and your not going to like it, so get ready for it, now grow up!!!!

Whoa. I bought a book called “Honor Your Anger” This book tells about the different types of anger people have. It also will give you tests to take about your “anger style” so you can identify what anger style you have. My guess is ‘aggressive’ or a ‘rager’.
I’ve battled with my anger for over 15 years and I’m still having issues so this is a long journey and you will have to stick with it. If you back slide don’t give up.
My anger comes from being raped and beaten, then getting into an abusive relationship. If you didn’t have these issues you may have an easier time getting your anger under control.
Anger comes from fear. People use anger as a defense mechanism to repress their true feelings. You will need to get to the root of what makes you angry, and this will entail journaling.
If you truly want to change you will have to do the work and it won’t happen over night.
There are other books out there, but I like the one I listed because repressing anger is not healthy either. Anger is a healthy human emotion as long as it is used in a productive and non-abusive way.
Also, anger and other emotions get trapped in our body and that is difficult to figure out. I really think you need to buy some books because the advise here is not nearly enough to help you and like the other girl said hormones can play a big part in it too.
Good Luck!

I know that you don’t want to hear the words ‘anger management’ but seriously to get better don’t you think you need to have some proper counselling?
It’s great that you recognise that you need help but look at your question again and see how desperate things are? as hard as it is for you to hear you do need to have some proper therapy.
good luck, you have made the first step, please continue walking

honestly i think you need psychotherapy to uncover the reasons your so anger, there is something underneath causing it , from earlier in your life ? – something someone did ? whatever you need to do therapy to uncover reasons and learn to develop ways to manage your anger.
i know how hard it can be because i struggled all my life to with it, goodluck.

Anger is rooted in handling criticism.
Handling criticism is one of life’s struggles for us all. It never ends. But what does work is to start seeing yourself as a person who can select what to listen to and what not to listen to when criticized. What I mean is to see in your mind an invisible shield protecting you so if someone says something nasty it just bounces off and back at them. Also, start practicing really believing that, “what you say about me is none of my business.” Start practicing feeling strong and good about yourself and not needing the good word of others.

I started with anger problems when my dad died last year.I did the same things like you’ve done.What helps me when i get angry is punching a pillow or cushion or try writing positive things down that makes you feel happy.I used to jump on empty egg boxes and that really helped me.Put some music on that you like.Try talking to a member of family about your problem.I hope this info helps!
All the best!!!
Bexie x

I have the same problem but I manage to control it.
My guy friend also has this problem and he has some kind of pills that he takes everyday when he wakes up.
Maybe you could try that?
Good luck

Go to a psychiatrist and s/he can prescribe medication – and an anger management program given by a qualified therapist.

two words.
MEDICINAL MARIJUANA.
try it b/f you cut me down about this.

You don’t say how old you are, so difficult to say whether hormones are playing any kind of part, sometimes if we get stressed or too tired not eating properly, poor self-esteem, difficulty expressing what we really want to say. There are all kinds of things that can make us short-tempered.
Consider dietary factors, low sugars from not eating for long periods, or high sugars from too many high energy drinks/snacks can affect mood and may act as a trigger. It’s certainly worth looking at how often and what kind of things/situations trigger your anger.
You could ask yourself, just after you’ve calmed down, how did that particulary episode start and what was it exactly that made you SO angry you “lost it.”
Patterns may then emerge and from those you may be able to find your own solutions. The fact you recognise your anger as being horrible shows good awareness, so I don’t think it’s impossible to control your anger, and perhaps if you tell yourself that too, you’ll start to believe it. Some people though do use this recognition of a problem as a bit of security blanket, and excuse but if you’re a fully functioning adult then it’s not a very good excuse. To me though, I think you are actively seeking solutions so you’re already taking some control over things.
Relaxation and simple exercise, getting good nutrition and a good sleeping routine will all help to destress you. Making sure you get some time to yourself to do what you want, even if it’s only an hour, is important. Address whatever negatives you’re feeling in life, and look for the positives but accept you can’t do it all and certainly there are no quick fixes.
Finally, find a way of letting loose now and then, don’t rely on counting to ten, if you need to let off steam do it, but perhaps in a different way. Take a deep breath and then walk away and vent the anger at a harmless target or save some of that aggression and use it to keep fit get a boxing bag, box the heck out of it at home. Take up a sport where hitting things is not only OK but if you do it well they’ll give you prizes!
Good luck.