Is It Normal To Have Low Self Esteem And To Be Unable To Build Yourself Up Too Much?

They’re not trying to help you so much as trying to reconstruct you around their own wishes and desires. They’re basically using you to try and gain a sense of power and control over their own lives.
People do it a lot, and sometimes they aren’t even aware that they’re doing it at all.
Low self-esteem is normal… but can be at least partly overcome by lowering your opinion of others to beneath your own self-opinion… thereby eradicating the issue by proxy.

normal is not the right word to use its just one of those things but you need some cognitive behavorial therapy to help gain your confidence.

I’m impressed by your query. I would recommend a recently written book by Bernstein et al called ” Psychology” 7th ed.
From my own observation of people; this mounts to a defence mechanism. If you for instance have a friend who constantly suggests to you to go for a specific job or lifestyle; it may be that they are in effect getting you to live their dreams for them. To help is acceptable but in your instance; you want to be in charge and make decisions. It is this that shapes up your life and not that you go on to live a life for others. Hence; may I as a compromise suggest this. As you may be receiving unwanted help from folks that are close to you and you may not want to loose them by being outright spoken by telling them off; you could perhaps not communicate all of your wants and desires to others around you so as to espouse them to ” think ” for you.
That is; keep a rap over what you plan to do. When you do accomplish what you wanted to do without their knowledge; it would be too late for them ‘ to offer to help”.
The other strategy along with this is to keep ” offered help ” at an arms lenght. Say that you will think it over and get back to them even if you don’t agree with their suggestions.
Keep the communication level at an all time low if it starts to ” hurt ” you in the process.
Best wishes…
frank….