What Can I Do To Get More Organized With 4 Month Old And A Husband That Wont Help At All Around The House?

I was in the same boat that u were in……i worked full time my 2 month old was going to a sitter because i didnt know if my husband would be able to to watch the baby while i wasnt there….then when i came home i had to cook supper laundry,everything that has to deal with the house and then take care of the baby on top of that and man did i ever get tired so one day i told him a little white lie and told him that the babies sitter was sick and couldnt watch the baby and he was going to have to watch him……well lets just say i was at work for no more then 4 hours and i got a phone call…..he was going crazy he couldnt do it;…….so i went hime and had a big talk with him…..now hes the one working full time and i get to stay home with my wounderful son… Untill they realize how hard it really is to take care of a child they will never change….but even now that i dont waork all day he still comes home and helps,u have to make it right hunny because if u dont ur going to go crazy…sit down talk to him or just pull a little white lie….if that doesnt work then i suggest that maybe u go for some counsilling…i hope that this helps…

Hire a cleaning service for the house.
Don’t cook, eat takeout or buy frozen meals.
For bills, set them up to be automatically paid from your credit card so you don’t have to do it each month. Set up online banking for the rest of the bills.
Do grocery shopping online or during lunch hour at work.
Let the house remain a little messy, it doesn’t have to look as good as it did before baby.

First of all get that baby on a schedule (4mth olds WILL go on a sch.) feedings at 5, 8, 11, 2, 5, 8, 11, and so on. Schedule goes like this sleep, eat, play then back to sleep. Babies are flexible with time but not routine. Then if you can trust him put that baby in a swing or bouncer right in front of him and go take a shower. Then I would stop doing HIS laundry , he’ll figure it out if his doesn’t have clothes. but when he says something about don’t fight or get confrontational about just say “I’m so sorry you don’t have anything to wear. I have been really stressed lately , after i do the dishes, feed the baby, bath the baby, etc I’ll try to do the laundry” Try using “I” statements like I feel ….. instead of You aren’t doing…. Maybe he doesn’t know what to do right now either. hope this helps.

First, tell your husband that you feel this way. If that doesn’t work withold sex. If that doesn’t work, see a marriage counselor. If your husband refuses to go to the marriage counselor, go alone.

Don’t forget to take care of yourself. Hey, if you can afford it hire someone to clean for you. I have someone that comes in (only when I am feeling overwhelmed) to get my stuff organized. She charges 10 dollars an hour.
If you want to get back at your husband, don’t do any of his laundry. He will eventually do it. (worked for me)

Is he one of the guys that thinks that it doesn’t take much more work for you to take care of your 4 month old? If he is, I would suggest (If you can trust him alone with the baby) that when you go to the store or have to run errands that you leave the baby with him. I think that he will start to realize how much work you are actually doing and hopefully try and step up and help out more. I hope this helps! Good Luck!

1st–if hubby won’t help and dosen’t care enough about you and his child to help out some after talking to him, I’d offer for him to go to a counselor with me or give him the boot!!’
2nd–Remember you don’t have to clean everything perfect and spotless! If you have 5 minutes, clean what you can as best you can for 5 minutes.
Here’s what I do:
Pick up after yourself!! It’s so hard for me! LOL Pick up what you can when you can. If you’re in the living room and have to go to the bathroom, check to see if there is anyhting in the living room that needs to be taken to the bathroom, like makeup or hair accesories.
I vacuum my living room/dining room almost daily (It our most used part of the house) with my baby tied to me (in a wrap–make your own out of 5 yards of fabric-no sewing required go to http://www.wearyourbaby.com)-I kinda dance as I do it and he loves it- it takes <5 minutes and although not spotless-it helps.
Wash dishes as you use them. Don’t let them pile up. Wash what you can as you cook. (I use Dawn direct so there is no need to make a sinkful of water for 2 bowls and 2 spoons, ya know!) Don’t go to bed with dirty dishes!!!! If you have a dishwasher turn it on at night before bed and unload it in the AM.
“clean” your bathroom daily-do it after your shower, use your washcloth to wipe the sink and the outside of the toilet. Or you can use Lysol or Clorox wipes. Use your bath towel to wipe down the tub/shower. Use the toilet brush to give the bowl a swish. No need for cleaners daily. I do a GOOD clean w/ cleaner every 2 weeks. Replace hand towel daily. My bathroom is always clean and ready for company! (before I had #2 I cleaned the bathroom as my son played in the tub! I HAD to be in there with him anyway, so I got something done!)
Every evening after baths we run the washer-doesn’t matter if it is a full load of not (although with 2 adults, a 3 year old and a 2 month old-it’s usually a full load) Then dry them before bed. Then fold them the next evening as you watch TV (makes it less boring and less like work!) and at each commercial put away what you have folded!
My hubby usually sweeps and mops before bed-so no one falls on a wet floor.
And dusting-invest in a duster. Wear your baby, turn on the radio and dance around as you dust!
I use Murphy’s oil soap about once a month.
WEAR YOUR BABY!!! You can get so much done!!I paid $5, $6 and $12 for my 3 homemade wraps! And they are worth SOOOOO much more!! I use them daily!!

As a nanny for a busy family I had to learn how to involve others. Granted your baby is too young to help but your husband isn’t. Find out what chores he will do and ask him to do them. My husband likes to do the dishes because he wants to make sure they are clean when they come out. i empty he washes. Also have him sort laundry or something quick like that. I liked the idea about stopping doing his and also leaving your baby with him to run errands great for bonding!
I knew a family where the dad always changed the poopy diapers and gave baths this was great for bonding too! Anything that will give him instant feelings of helping out and you can easily build on the small stuff.
We both work alot and go to school so I have had to learn to do more than one thing at once. I do laundry while cooking and etc..
Also pay your bills online or set up the majority to come out automatically. This has saved me at least 30 mins a week.
I hope all these small things help and just remember your husband should not be just another thing to take care of…

I don’t really have an answer other than to say, do what you can and if the sweeping or dusting just has to wait until morning then so be it. You need to be at your best for the baby, so if you need a nap…take one. The cleaning can wait an hour or so.
If you get any better suggestions could you let me know?
My husband is the same way, and talking to him is useless, because he just doesn’t get it and he actually complains that I should do more for him. He thinks counselling is bull…and would never agree to go. As for the people telling you to ditch him…that’s easy to say, but just complicates things a million times more. If you love him and he’s a good husband in other ways, definitely don’t leave him.
One thing that’s helped me a little, is to ask for little favors one at a time instead of making a general complaint, and nagging just makes it worse. And most importantly, ignore his whining when you ask for a favor, because you have to do what you have to do and he can complain all he wants, just so long as he does it.