When You Were Young, Did The People Who Were Teaching You Lessons About Life Say Anything To You About Goals?

I hear you. Basically that is how I was brought up. My parents did not encourage me to be anything other than a wife and mother. I have had a difficult time with this over the years. I was raised in the 60′s, but they still instilled that in me. I suppose if they thought it was good enough for their era, it was good enough for me. I held that against them, though I never said anything. Later in years when I was an adult, I figured I could take control of my own destiny, but you know what? All those dreams of what they wanted for me, haunted me, and still does. I don’t lose sleep over it, but it makes me happy to see parents that will encourage their children, and talk to them about how important goals are. I would have done a lot different if I had received the support from my parents rather than they placing on me, what they wanted my life to turn out like. I loved my family, having and raising my son, but in the middle of it all, I lost myself. Haven’t gotten me back, and it’s probably getting too late. I’m just to tired to think about doing anything for me in the silver days of my life.

Almost on a daily basis. My life may have been different if I had worked harder to obtain some of those goals.

Like you, no one ever told me to set goals in life. Not my parents, grandparents, teachers, etc. When I was very young, I wanted to be a nurse. Later on, I couldn’t wait to get married & have babies. During high school, I wanted to go to Cosmetology school & become a beautician. I married two years after graduation from high school. Two years later, I had my first son. In the back of my mind, I still wanted to become a beautician but put those plans on the back burner for a while. I had two more sons, & later on, I finally found the right time to go to cosmetology school. I did well, in school, & after passing the state board test on the first try, I went to work for others, then when my clientele was built up, I opened my own salon. What a happy day that was!!!!

Oh, yes. There were short-term goals, long-term goals, and immediate goals. They all involved me working hard, saving all my money, and putting off my immediate desires to achieve my long term goal. So, I worked hard, achieved my long-term goal, but lost out on fun, friends, and important events (such as the only Jim Morrison concert held at my high school, but I couldn’t go because I had to work), so, while I am satisfied I accomplished what I wanted, I do feel as if I’ve misplaced a large part of my formative years–I’m still missing something.

The word was never mentioned I don’t believe.My mom was the wife, mother and cook. Never did they consider my future.To this day I don’t know why.Life was different in the 60′s.I married, had 3 kids .Happy and all but to this day I kick myself for not having the courage to set my own goals.Retirement would be a lot easier I am sure.I do encourage my grandchildren to continue their education.No one told me so I am telling them.Absolutely life would be different had I set goals.

How odd…I don’t ever remember the subject of GOALS being discussed at any point in my upbringing. It wasn’t until I went for the Jr. College interview & testing that the subject came into view. I didn’t like the counselors assigning me meaningless classes that I had no interest in. I ended up dropping out because I thought that when you reached 18, you could make your own decisions about life. I decided to marry my High School Sweetheart. Then my goal was to live out those fairy tales that my sitters read to me every night at bedtime. My life has been one missed opportunity after another. I am good at helping others…I just can’t seem to help myself as well! I had it all at one point & let it go because I had no idea how lucky I was. When you have no life experience…that’s what happens. I didn’t do the same thing to my child…I let them have those experiences & make their own decisions! After giving birth, my goal was to raise a free spirit & I know that I successfully reached that goal!

I was so lousy at sports that I HATED any mention of goals.
My family often set goals for me but I never seemed to be good enough for them.
However I did lead a very successful life and when I get over the current hurdle I am facing hope to again.
My family used to criticize the way I brought up my kids. They turned out real well and the anti social one they used to criticize, well he still isn’t the sort to participate in shallow social activities but he loves his teaching job and I was the proudest mum when I saw him take out his PhD last year.
Proud of that but I am even prouder of the fact that both my boys are nice kind people who don’t judge others by their own perhaps inappropriate goals.
They and I like to work out our own goals thank you.

yes we were very fortunate to have a teacher name mr griffen you was also our class sponsor and that is all he talked about was goals — today i am 67 and i still have goals and i will always have them!!! i would have bet my life would have been a lot different if if had NOT had goals!!!

I remember my folks using terms like dreams and aspirations. Not the term goal until I entered college.

No one ever talked to me about goals, I just figured it out for myself. An elderly relative guided me in the right direction, thank God.

No, they were never mentioned. I was born in 44 so according to my folks I could be a housewife and mother, a teacher, secretary, or a stewardess. It never occurred to them or me to go to college. Rich girls went to college. Women had few choices. Goals? What goals?

You are so right about parents not saying anything about
goals. It is possible, that since they didn’t have any, they
couldn’t very well pass on those thoughts to us. My mom was
a stay at home mom, and worked only before I was born as
the oldest child. My father was a government worker
all of his life,and that was a safe job without frills or enjoyment.
All our neighbors were the same. They did their nine to five
jobs, rode the bus home, and did the same things day after
day on their jobs. Seems like they all had white collar jobs,
and every family did the same things as we did. In fact,
when one family cleaned up their yards with mowing, then
each of the others followed suit in the next day or the one
after. Same thing with clothing trends. Everyone wanted to
be like the next guy on the block. So they copied the first
person to show something new in style, til every man was
out in pale blue pants and plaid shirt/jackets. It’s funny how
our neighbors copied each other. I believe we were the first
on our block to get a TV, and then our next door neighbors
were seen having one delivered. That was the way it was
with our neighborhood.

In high school the English teacher talked about goals frequently. It didn’t mean anything to me. Now I wish
I had listened.

The word “goal” did not come into play until the 60s when after dropping out of college to join the Army. A Colonel at the OCS I attended took me aside and talked about goals in life versus day by day. He changed my life. I grew up in a very small farm community and just getting away from there was not a goal but escape from the mundane. Guys farmed and girls became housewives. On the other hand my wife (no longer) grew up in a large city and had definite goals she knew she could accomplish. Her focus was enhanced by feeling nothing was impossible.